In
an online article (since deleted) I once read “10 Excuses for
Avoiding Psychotherapy”.
The first was a doozy: “If I go into
therapy it means I'm a loser and I'm weak and can't stand on my own
feet. It's better to work on myself without a crutch so that I keep
strong.”
There is actually not a smidgen of truth to that.
Just like you would do if your car needed fixed, or your heart needed surgery, or you needed legal assistance -- get professional help. You deserve to feel better.